Sunday, July 05, 2009

Spotted: It's the White House!

My internship program paid for my fellow interns and I to tour the Newseum. While we were waiting for our tour to begin we took some time to see the sights. For those who may not know, the Newseum has a spectacular view of the Capitol building. It is very symbolic of the press' role. Being a journalism student I thought that most of my fellow interns would also pick up on the symbolism. I at least thought they would know what building we were looking at. 

This is the point in the story where a fellow intern turns to our entire group and screams, "Look guys, it's the WHITE HOUSE!" We all turn to her with the same face: disgust. The guy standing next to me said, "That is the Capitol building. Why did you even come to DC if you didn't know that?"

 It was a sad day for interns everywhere. And did I mention this girl is my roommate? I have to live with comments like that every day.

Heard: Not All Red Badges are Interns

I just wanted to let everyone know that not everyone who wears a red badge on the Hill is an intern.  I wear a red badge, yet I'm not an intern, I'm a contractor.  In fact, everyone in my office on the Hill has red badges, even FTEs.  Staffers, don't give me dirty looks when you see me walking around the Capitol Complex while Congress is in session in my business casual and unshaven face, as I make at least twice as much as you.

Spotted: Self-Explanatory

GW Dorms - 21 (GWU)

Reply to: [Errors when replying to ads?]
Date: 2009-07-01, 9:07PM EDT

Any other horny interns out there? 

Your pic gets mine. 

  • Location: GWU
  • it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 1249582297

Spotted: Softball Stride of Pride

My team played a rival institution in softball last night. This morning, I had to get into work early to complete a task for my boss. On my way in on the Redline, I spotted one of the female interns from our rival team still sporting her softball uniform from last night. It is possible that she was just going to work in her softball clothing and then changing, but I’m not going to give her the benefit of the doubt. Either way it is unseemly. Moral of the story interns:  if you have to do a walk/metro ride of shame, do it earlier before people start going to work, or at least change out of your uniform.

Heard: Only the Best

I intern for a congressman along with three others.Three of us started the beginning of the week, but for some reason the 4th didn't show up until later that week. 

One day we got off early so all the interns decided to go get some drinks. We get to the bar, the new guy immediately heads to the bar and asks for a Jameson, because its "only the best" for him, and  he likes "to drink with class." We are in a mexican restaurant. The bar tender blankly stares at him, and goes, "Ok, how do you want it, rocks or neat or what?" 

The new guy proceeds to ask him what that even means.

Heard: Souvenirs

this came from my friend, who is a congressional intern this summer. i also sent it in to

(323): I woke up with three nat lights, a bottle of ketchup, a role of toilet paper, and one of those little flashlights bouncers use to check ids, all in my purse. Apparently I wanted souvenirs from every bar in Georgetown last night.

Heard: Sacagawea!

Last year, I lived in intern housing on the Hill. One day, a roommate of mine who interned in the House was practicing his Capitol tour. He got to the portion about the dome of the Capitol, to which he said, "On top of the outside of the Dome is one of our most famous Americans, Sacagawea."

Spotted: High School Cafeteria

I was walking towards the Dirksen cafeteria from Russell, and just as I turned the corner, a group of 6 or 7 interns got out of the elevator in front of me and proceeded to walk towards the cafeteria. As we all turned the corner into the small hallway that leads to the actual entrance to the cafeteria, they decided to stop in the hall, completely blocking the way for me and the other staff who were just trying to get some lunch. They seemed a little amused (and possibly embarrassed) they were blocking the hall and then started walking again, eventually entering the cafeteria in front of me, where they all split up to get their lunch. The lines were huge (it was clearly a lobby day for some group, since half the people in there had the same red shirts on).

Two of the interns looked at the long line for the grill, pointed to the front, and then proceeded to try to cut the entire line, which they must have concluded was full of less important constituents and staff. A minute or two later, I could hear the man taking orders at the grill say something about how everyone had to wait in the line. Trying to eat somewhat healthy, I was working my way through the salad bar, when I spotted another of the group, who had apparently decided to go through the line backwards, starting at the salad dressings and ending at the lettuce. Whatever his reasoning for doing so, he was clearly unhappy that people were constantly in his way when he tried to get his next salad bar item.

I know many of you work really hard for our offices, but it is still important to remember that when you are not doing your actual work, in the halls and cafeteria of the United States Senate you should not revert to your behavior in high school.

Spotted: Get Out of Our Shot

Having recently completed a brief stint as a Senate intern, and now possessing the distinction of being able to proudly call myself a former DC intern, I feel that I must share this story.

On a particularly slow day in the office, a couple fellow interns and I had decided that we should go down to Senate gallery to watch a vote take place before checking out for the day. On the way down though, I insisted that we stop to say hi to some new friends in another Senate office (more interns- mostly I wanted to follow up with a cute girl I had met the day before). Walking down the Hart building hallway to the other office, we passed a crowd of reporters and cameramen, all standing around anxiously. I didn’t think much of it.

When we got to the office, I didn’t see anyone that I immediately recognized, so we decided to head back the down the hallway to the elevator. As we turned into the elevator hall though, we were quickly met by a mob of security guards, all surrounding a certain recent Supreme Court nominee, who was going down the hallway to meet with a Senator. We quickly turned to the opposite direction, to find that the crowd of reporters had solidified into a solid mass of cameras, all pointed towards the Judge. And we were right in the middle.

We sprinted down towards the reporters as they screamed for us to get out of their shot, eventually reaching them only slightly ahead of the nominee. We tried to conceal our scarlet letters as we awkwardly squeezed through the gaps in the journalists, as they continued to shout criticisms at us. I suppose we deserved it, having just effectively ruined the biggest photo shoot in the city.

Spotted: Hate Mail - Help Interns Find Employment

[editor of the blog did not change anything - including spelling and grammar - in the following e-mail submission]

I have worked twice as an intern in DC, last summer and this year since February. I find it offensive that your blog portrays DC interns as being arrogant, immature, and annoying. I am a graduate student and I work very hard at my internship. I want to make a good impression so that I can increase my chances of getting a job. I face the prospect of being unemployed after graduation with no opportunities in this crappy economy. So how I can expect to have a chance of getting a job in DC if all interns are given a bad reputation by your retarded blog? Even though you write that the blog is only directed at the interns who engage in immature behavior, the general public will assume that all interns fit the stereotype portrayed in your blog. So I have a few words of advice for you:

1. Your blog reminds me of all the people who whine about DC tourists, but guess what, interns contribute a significant percentage to DC's GDP since they pay rent, purchase goods and services and pay taxes.
2. Interns donate their time and efforts without any compensation so that they can get some valuable work experience.
3. I am not sure if you were ever an intern or struggled to find employment, but I've got some news for you, it is a very dismal job market out there and your blog does not make it any easier for someone like me to find employment since future employers will read your blog and automatically assume that I am incompetent and immature like the "interns" in your blog. By the way, how do you know they are interns, is the word "intern" written on their foreheads?
4. And finally, I suggest you get a fucking life and do something more productive with your free time such as helping out DC's homeless. Or you can help interns find employment.